“I Had to Pee in a Bush” – The Trials of Being an Electric Vehicle Owner

Gary Varvel / creators.com
Gary Varvel / creators.com

Imagine building a toy electric car that came with a single battery that could never be swapped out. Once the battery dies for good, you have to just toss the toy out. That product would suck. No one would buy it for their child. Yet the adult version of that stupid toy, known as an electric vehicle or an EV, is somehow being purchased by virtue-signaling liberals.

Like children who play with battery-operated toy cars, these liberals inhabit a world of make-believe in which they believe they are saving the world from capitalism. The hilarious thing about this whole situation is the way that reality keeps smacking these people over the head.

The latest case in point is a hilarious post on the AutoBlog, in which a virtuous electric car owner complains that he “had to pee in a bush” because almost all EV charging stations are terrible. Not that this is unusual. Everything about owning an EV is terrible.

The fact that a person even owns an EV in the first place is proof that they’re evil (maybe that’s what “EV” is short for?). If you drive an electric car, you should know that at least one little black child slave died in a hellish cobalt mine in the Congo to create it for you. Be sure to put a Black Lives Matter bumper sticker on your electric vehicle to prove to everyone just how virtuous you are.

There’s also the fact that these vehicles tend to explode when they get wet, as we saw in the recent Florida hurricane. Does insurance cover that?

One of the other big negatives that electric car owners complain about is how cruddy the charging stations are. The next time you’re out and about, look at where the electric car charging stations are in your community (if it even has any). Then, think about how fun it would be to sit in that location for up to 50 hours while your car battery recharges to just 80% capacity.

That’s what a whiny electric car owner is complaining about in a recent post on AutoBlog. There’s nothing at all convenient about car charging stations. Imagine the conversation that must have taken place when an EV company goes to a Target about building a new charging station.

EV Maker: “We’ll build car charging stations in your parking lot if you want!”

Target: “Um, sure. Install them in the butt end of the parking lot, which is a mile-and-a-half away from everything else over there.”

EV Maker: “Perfect!”

But it’s not perfect. The locations of EV charging stations tend to be in abandoned parking lots, next to banks, and other locations where there’s actually nothing to do for the hours it takes to recharge the car.

It’s not like driving a wonderful gas-powered car that didn’t require any child sacrifices to create. When you’re on a road trip, you can stop in at a convenience store—which is totally convenient—for some chips and a drink and a trip to the bathroom while gassing up, and you’re back on the road in 10 minutes.

The whiny AutoBlog writer complained that there’s usually not even a place to pee when you’re getting your electric car charged. He was charging his EV at 10 p.m. in a parking lot recently, and there were no stores open anywhere nearby when nature called. He had to hop over a guardrail and take a whiz in a bush.

“I suspect I’m not the only EV driver who has risked a public indecency charge during what would have otherwise been a routine pit stop in a conventional car.”

So, you can add routine public indecency to the travails of owning an electric vehicle, too. Chalk this up as yet another reason why the Democrats’ pipe dreams of forcing us all into electric cars just aren’t working out.