Bring Back Celebrity Spies – Let’s Start With the Kardashians

Beauty Hero /
Beauty Hero /

Back in World War II, the idea of using celebrities as spies was simply ingenious. As the Washington Post set the scene, “Josephine Baker regularly attended parties at embassies and consulates in occupied France, where she would flirt with high-ranking Nazi officials. Because of her celebrity as a dancer, actor, and singer, the German men would swoon over her — and sometimes begin to divulge military secrets after being plied with alcohol.”

Continuing the ruse, “Baker would later jot down notes and hide them where she hoped no one would find them: in her underwear. In her 1977 autobiography “Josephine,” she wrote how those secrets were “snugly in place, secured by a safety pin,” so they could be carried past checkpoints and delivered to the French Resistance.”

With Russia and Ukraine as well as Palestine and Israel going at odds, the likelihood of World War III breaking out is growing exponentially. Ultimately, it means this kind of intelligence is something we could bring back now. Given the preponderance of social media, plausible deniability, secret, and even double agents would be easy to manufacture. We can take people who provide little beyond dramatic entertainment but who are household names and make them into the spies we need.

Given the preponderance of people like the Kardashian family to talk themselves into and out of damn near any situation, they could be sent in easily as spies. They get caught? The liberals go nuts and demand we go to war, and the next generated “celebrity” is next in the mix and ready to go.

For many actors and actresses, this would be a great honor, too. After we used people like magician Harry Houdini, movie actress Marlene Dietrich, chef Julia Child (who knew??), and king of the silver screen Cary Grant, this puts any spy celeb in great company. It’s like sending a snake into the snake pit. Only our snake can lower their defenses by unlocking hidden childhood dreams.